Monday Blues: Is this how Wile E. Coyote feels?

I lay in bed, pretending my alarm is not about to shriek its awful chorus into my ears, imagining that 6 my children have not already greeted the day with their excited chatter and and the pounding and bounding of many small feet in the bedroom over top of my head. I drag the covers up, wishing I could hide in this warm blanket cocoon until Tuesday. But Mommy duties demand attention, and hungry little tummies need nourishment, lunches must be packed, and little shoelaces require double knotting. I escape from beneath my cozy, purring kitty and test the chilly floors with my toes. And then it hits me.

Monday.  

Suddenly, I'm aware of every aching joint in my body, a heavy weariness that not even my morning java can dislodge. I feel as if I dreamed all night of being Wile E. Coyote, victimized by anvils crashing on his head. It's going to be a long day. "Dear God, " I pray, "Help me. Help me, please."

As the fog clears, I see it for what it is, the Church hangover, the Monday blues, adrenaline dump. What bothers me the most is not the physical symptoms, but the emotional: the pervasive feelings of worthlessness and hopelessness. It's ironic, feeling this way after a Sunday of serving God and the church, because without Him, we are worthless and hopeless.

I can't shake those 'feelings' so I call them what they are: feelings, not facts.  Feelings will pass, and tomorrow I'll be back to feeling like myself, optimistic, hope-filled, energetic. For today, I'll look for truth - what does God say about me? A few verses come to mind as I think about how God thinks about me, about us. I'll try to focus on these things - God's love, His care, His plan - rather than my weariness, as I pour milk into cereal bowls, change diapers, and begin to work on next Sunday's worship music.

Psalm 139:13-16 NLT
You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother's womb.  Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous-how well I know it. You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion, as I was woven together in the dark of the womb. You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed.

Romans 8:37-39 NLT
 No, despite all these things, overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us. And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God's love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow-not even the powers of hell can separate us from God's love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below-indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Jeremiah 29:11 NLT
For I know the plans I have for you," says the LORD. "They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.

Ephesians 2:10 NLT
For we are God's masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.

Romans 5:6-8 NLT
When we were utterly helpless, Christ came at just the right time and died for us sinners. Now, most people would not be willing to die for an upright person, though someone might perhaps be willing to die for a person who is especially good. But God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners.

John 10:10 NLT
The thief's purpose is to steal and kill and destroy. My purpose is to give them a rich and satisfying life.

How are you feeling today? What Truth is God pointing you towards to draw you closer to Him?

Monday Blues: To work or not to work?

Monday always comes. Whether you are a pastor, musician, volunteer, or church-goer, Monday comes. And if you've been 'on duty' Sunday, you'll probably feel some level of exhaustion. Maybe depression. Maybe crankiness. Maybe numbness. Lack of motivation. Lack of a good attitude, perhaps? Your post-Sunday feelings don't reflect how good you are in ministry or how spiritually mature you are. Many of the most famous, well-known and gifted pastors and evangelists have shared their bouts of depression and difficulty. We should not be ashamed of being worn out after a day of ministry; Monday Blues comes and goes with the work of ministry. It's our bodies' responses to the hormonal fluctuations that come with Sunday's spiritual warfare.

So what to do with Monday? Is it a good day to work? Or a good day to take a day off? If you're bi-vocational or a volunteer in ministry, you probably don't have a choice. You pull your boot straps up, put on your hat, and away you go to your day job so that you can pay your bills and afford to do ministry. It isn't easy, but you do it anyway because that's what you have to do for your family and your church.

 But if you're in ministry full time, what do you do? Some folks find that making Monday their day, so they can rest and recoup,  works best for them. They can chill out on their day off and get ready for a new week. But others feel like that's selfish -it takes away a good day from their family time and leaves the family with the worst, most unhappy part of the week. If you take off  Monday, do you work Friday and Saturday?

If you take off of work on Saturday, can you compartmentalize enough to avoid thinking about work to concentrate on family? Or do you need to work Saturday to prepare for Sunday?

My question is this: do we plan our weekly schedule around the feelings that we know are going to happen on Monday, around the needs of the church, or around the needs of our family? Or somehow find a way to balance all three?

Thought for Thursday

"Have you been asking God what He is going to do? He will never tell you. 

God does not tell you what He is going to do; 

He reveals to you who He is."

-Oswald Chambers (1874-1917)

Worship Tip Wednesday:When the Feeling Doesn't Flow

I would love to say that every worship service we all felt perfectly in tune to God, delightfully communing with Him, feeling His presence, His peace, His love. But the reality is, we are all human. And sometimes, the feelings just don't flow.

Worship feels empty. 

Or maybe dry. 

Or void because we don't like the songs. 

Or maybe we are caught up in the songs and forget to worship. 

And our feelings for God just don't flow. 

Maybe we're tired or stressed or distracted by the hard notes or the verse we just forgot. Or maybe we had a fight with our spouse, yelled at our kids, forgot to charge our tablets and ran out of coffee for breakfast. Maybe we are grieving the loss of a job or a loved one or we are losing hope. And those feelings of worship just can't flow. 

But it's ok.

It's ok to feel that way, because we are human, And it's ok to feel that way because we have a great big God who can carry all those troubles. And it's ok to feel that way, because our feelings don't change God. No matter how we feel, He is worthy. No matter how big or small, happy, sad, dry, or filled up we feel, no matter how dispassionate or passionate or utterly confused we might be feeling, God is worthy of our praise. 

So it's ok. It's ok to stand up and sing with tear-stained cheeks, or a broken heart. 

It's ok to stand up and sing when you feel empty because is still the one who fills us up and He is worthy. 

It's ok to feel lonely. Tired. Dried up. Burnt out. 

Because God rewards those who earnestly seek Him. 

We can praise God no matter what, because God's Word tells us how good He is, because His past work in our lives reminds us that God isn't finished with us or our lives, or our friends and our families. We can keep on singing - even when we don't feel it - because we know that God is good, and He will be faithful even when times are hard.

My prayer for me, my prayer for you, is that when we don't feel like singing, when we don't feel like worshipping, or leading the congregation, or when everything feels tired and dry and you can relate more to zombies than angels, that God will show us His grace. I pray we see His unending, undeserved grace to help us rely on what we know about God so that we can worship Him on the good days and hard ones. 

Psalm 116

Sometimes we forget that being a believer in Christ means living a life of spiritual warfare. It's no wonder Sundays make us tired! We're not just 'doing church' but also fighting a spiritual battle to praise, worship, spread the Word of God, and be together as a family in the name of Christ. And Satan wants nothing more than to thwart our every attempt at drawing near to God. It's the best work of all, but it's hard work. It's worth it, but it's wearing on our hearts, our souls, and our bodies. So just stop, take a minute, and read Psalm 116. The Psalmist may have been weary from physical battles but he knew there was a battle for his soul, as well. Remember that the Lord hears your cries and has compassion when you're facing physical and spiritual battles. It's Monday, but the Lord hears you in your weariness.  Call on him. And then return to your rest, soul.

Psalm 116, NIV

1 I love the Lord, for he heard my voice;
    he heard my cry for mercy.
2 Because he turned his ear to me,
    I will call on him as long as I live.

3 The cords of death entangled me,
    the anguish of the grave came over me;
    I was overcome by distress and sorrow.
4 Then I called on the name of the Lord:
    “Lord, save me!”

5 The Lord is gracious and righteous;
    our God is full of compassion.
6 The Lord protects the unwary;
    when I was brought low, he saved me.

7 Return to your rest, my soul,
    for the Lord has been good to you.

Worship Team Helps by Paul Baloche

Can't make it to a worship team workshop? Great news - YouTube brings it to you! I happened to find a neat resource on YouTube to help your worship team get even better. Orchestrated by Paul Baloche along with other well known worship leaders, this set of videos is great for a range of beginner and pro worship teams. They focus on everything from vocal warm-ups and breathing techniques to mapping out songs for the band and vocals.

The vocal video is long - 2 hours - so you might want to pick and choose the things that your team needs most. But it is definitely worth watching for your own professional enrichment!  Check it out here: https://youtu.be/DZ1LjkdxBuE?list=PL5Yc6HcnI4MdTzwVivl1MgHmvAPgqEVBK

and let me know what you think!

Spiritual Formation: Van Devotions

I have a confession to make.

I have a really hard time finding time to do devotions. And that's mostly because I have a really hard time finding a place and a time to really get alone with God. My husband and I have 5 small children. Clearly, I cannot even use the bathroom alone. And since they are all typically awake before 6am, getting up before them is not really feasible. So more often than not, if I want to have devotional time, it's in front of children.

Do you know how difficult it is to have a magnificent, meaningful, spiritual moment of time alone with God in the presence of 5 small children? If you have any children, or know any children, I'm sure you've got a pretty good idea. I love my kiddos  - they are fantastic, amazing, interesting, fun beings who are jam packed with laughter and energy. Meditation is not in their vocabulary. Often times, the best I can do is load them in our mini-van with snacks and electronic devices and sit in a park with my Bible and attempt to concentrate. It's not ideal. It doesn't feel spiritual, especially when I have to holler towards the back of the van to stop the fighting, screaming, and pestering.  It feels frustrating. Annoying. And a waste of time.

But the truth is, it isn't.

God's Word will not return void. It is alive, powerful, and active. And these things are true no matter how spiritual I feel at any given moment. It is God's Word and it has worth in and of itself. So if I faithfully read even when my situation isn't perfect, God will faithfully reward me with Himself because HE IS PERFECT. But there's more.

When we pull up to our favorite park, where snacks and electronic babysitters have become the norm, something else has normalized, too. One of my toddlers inevitably asks, "Mommy read Bible now?"

Yes, darling. Just for a few minutes, Mommy will read her Bible now.

And even though it's hard to concentrate, and it's impossible to feel 'spiritual,' and I get cranky at times when I'm trying to do devotions in my van, my little ones are learning the importance of my Bible, God's Word, no matter what my situation says. I may not be able to get time alone, but I can still make time with God a priority. I might not be able to create an atmosphere that feels spiritual, but God will still meet me there. I might get distracted and have to begin again, but God rewards those who earnestly seek Him. So I'll offer a little extra grace when my children get bored, and give myself some, too, when I get a little bit out of sorts. And focus on what's important: seeking God through His eternal Word.

Let the van devotions begin.